For The Love Of LIght.

Truth.

How can one such tiny word provoke fear, spite, and malevolence? We should crave the truth as though it were the Filet Mignon and we were the starving artist.

Seek it. Love it. Embrace it.

Unfortunately, we have all fallen victim to fearing it.

Rejecting it.
Attacking it.
And over time, denying it…

Why? Because we are human. Because we all wish to believe the best in people. Because if the “truth” has the possibility of endangering our happiness, it suddenly becomes the enemy.

As for the messenger? They quickly become reduced to trouble makers, at best.

To this very day, I still cling to the quote by Anne Frank. “In spite of everything, I still believe that people are really good at heart.”

So why do we lie? Why do human beings find the need to deceive, blind, and ultimately crush the hearts of those around them?

Some do it because they want to have their cake and eat it too.

Others lie out of fear.
Insecurity.
The desire to be accepted by everyone.
To make themselves what those around them wish to see at the time.

In my 32 years of life, I have observed many individuals, including myself. When light is shed upon darkness, something of a battle ensues. But in the end, light always wins out. Even when the truth hurts us so much that we feel we can no longer go on, it eventually WILL set us free.

Not just because I wrote this but because God is a lover of truth.

The deceitful are always exposed for who they truly are and the glory light shines through, once again.

I only pray that someday, we can all be honest with one another and hide nothing. What a beautifully simple place that would be.

Life should never be about hiding but ALWAYS about SHINING.

So SHINE ON EVERYONE!
*bless*

So Hold Onto Nothing As Fast As You Can.

Adrienne’s are notorious for tangents and I suppose this is one of them.
I’m happy with where this journey is taking me despite having no idea how the story ends.
I never have and never will, be afraid to turn the page.
Each chapter surprises me…still. One might concede that after 32 years of life, very little would be of any shock to my system. Especially after such stormy seas. Yet still, it rages on.
This life.
This dream.
This determination.
Watching the world around me as it spins us all into different directions.
Feeling the hot summer sun on my shoulders until the leaves fall from the trees and onto the ground, once more.
It all goes by so fast. It all goes by so slowly.
Only we can be the judge of that when the sun sets upon us.
It feels as though I’ve lived a thousand different lives and swam a million different oceans to get here.
And here I shall stay until the next wave catches me…until the next chapter is safe for me to enter.
Until then, I will bask in the beautiful, treacherous, and glorious present, that is life.

It’s true what they say.
Part of it is, anyway.
Perhaps none of this is what it seems.
Maybe reality is really the dream.
Tipping forward - Falling back
Making up for all you lack.
When digging still is not enough
to find that diamond in the rough.
How far must these limits be pushed?
until that final destined hush?
Going under - Falling up
working to overflow your cup.
Taking over - moving on.
Pressing pause till time is gone.
Is it true what they say?
Part of it is, anyway.
But only YOU can win this game.
Because only YOU are not the same.

© Adrienne J. Coe - 2009
Any and all reproductions of this writing will result in severe legal penalties and fees...bitches.

..::They Call Me Tiffany Twisted. I've Got That Mercedes Benz::..

In this lifetime, I have often found myself standing by the side of individuals who claim to want more out of life. Who pray for bliss and speak of dreams, make promises, and plans...

I believe wholeheartedly that they truly do desire these things. They crave a good life and truly believe...at least at one point...that their life will change.

What most fail to realize is the reality of one word. CHOICE.

We can pray, hope, dream, and even BELIEVE...but if we do not CHOOSE the proper paths in order to obtain these little slices of heaven, we will only find ourselves on the same path, living life in a circle, settling into the comfort of the "known". And as life passes by and age settles upon your face, heart, and soul, those once desired dreams will slowly begin to disappear.

I've seen this all too often.

And I'm sick of it.

It is called "ROCK BOTTOM" and many live there.
It's reminds me of the song "Hotel California" by the Eagles.

"We are all just prisoners here, of our own device" "Last thing I remember, I was running for the door. I had to find the passage back to the place I was before. 'Relax,' said the night man, we are programmed to receive. You can check-out any time you like, But you can never leave!'

I only realized this AFTER I wrote this poem. It is called "Rock Bottom" and unfortunately, from the things I have observed in this life, many are satisfied with it. I used to feel sorry for them...I still have pity. But this could never be my life.

Rock Bottom by Adrienne Jessica.

It Cradles you so slowly and tempts you with it's bliss.
Until the falling ceases and greets you with a kiss.
It takes no time to make some friends
who tell you of THEIR bitter ends
Until rock bottom actually begins to feel like life
It sucks you in.
Suddenly it no longer seems wrong.
Afterall, this life is rather quite long...
So as the days pass by hope slowly dies
until one day you stop looking through your own eyes.
The light grows dim and so you do you.
Nothing grows old and nothing blooms new.
But there is a secret and you hide it well.
YOU KNEW YOU WERE FALLING BEFORE YOU FELL.

© Adrienne Jessica 2010.
Any reproduction or copies produced without my permission will result in severe legal penalties and fees.

*Into The Great Wide Open*

From time to time, I like to take inventory of my life. I look around, behind, and in front of, my current self.

I take stock of the lessons I have learned, the love I have given, received, and all of the hearts who have I not only touched, but that have touched mine, as well.

I wish I could say everything was always perfect. That all of the hearts in my life were true. That honesty is like a disease and is contagious. That people choose to be understanding of one another…But I always take comfort in knowing that I am always true to myself and others as much as humanly possible.

That makes reality’s kiss a bit more sweet.

Tonight.

This night, as I look back, I see triumph. Pure, unadulterated, colossal triumph.

Like it were yesterday…
College - My one true drug. 8 years wondering around inside of the beautiful land of academia. 4.0

Singing in front of a million different people, writing, rhyming.

Walking into a new recording studio, smelling that strong and unstoppable scent of hope and determination. Traveling to shows and recording the same song a million times over. Singing along to familiar songs, and surrounding myself with words. Sometimes, too many.

Next, I look back as I meander through the unknown. Distractions flooded my world. I needed distractions then. Surrounding myself with people I couldn’t understand. People with ideals so foreign to my own that I was fascinated by their existence. I needed this. Wanted this. It was the very thing that would carry me from one chapter to the next…and it worked…Living on Coffee, Danishes, and dreams as they lived on debauchery, at best. It was my one true motivation. Watching them as they let it all just slip away…

And one day, a new city was found. Airports, more annoying than foreign. “The window seat, thank you”. Running to catch the train until my legs literally felt that they would fail me. Falling asleep on the ride home from Penn Station. Buying fruit from a sidewalk vendor and then inadvertently walking into a gay bar with my best friend carrying a bag of very large bananas. In true Adrienne fashion, “How do I get myself into these things?” seemed to be the question of the hour!

Going to weddings, bot mitzvahs, watching the DJ spin, promotional work for WBAB, Having my mail delivered to the Studio because Steven is such a perfectionist that he had to tweak each song five hundred and eleven times, visiting my friends in NC with a new take on life, watching my friends marry, start families, and take on amazing careers, fireworks blasting on the fourth of July while Steven dedicated and sang Crash by Dave Matthews, to me...And CHRISTMAS in the City. So magical.

I suppose as I look around myself now…this very second…this very night…

Wow.

And it has only just begun.